I have often asked myself..."Anthony, why are you so different than some people?" To be specific, Why am I watching Survivor on Thursday nights instead of hanging at the bar with friends? Why do I watch the Bachelor, 24, Dancing with the Stars, American Idol, Amazing Race, The Apprentice, Awards Shows and various sitcoms religiously? Well, the honest answer that I have come up with is, "Because I want to!" I have never been the guy that needed to stay at the bar til close. or the guy that had to stay awake past 10:00pm, or the guy that had to do the things that everyone else did just to fit in! When I am tired - I sleep. If I am bored - I mix it up. Most importantly, If I am happy - I leave it alone! Now the question is - "Why am I saying all this??" - Well - because this baby process is the same! I have talked to so many people about the various stages in pregnancy from the guy's point of view. And MOST of the guys have very similar feelings....
1) They are happy about having a kid, but a freaked out by having a "Baby!" They want that kid to pop out with a back-pack on and head to the bus stop for 1st grade! They want the little baseball player from Day 1.
2) They would rather gouge out their eyes with wooden spoons than go and register for shower gifts....or they refuse to be a part of the shopping process all together!
3) They despise baby classes, and think it is an entire waste of time! These are the same guys, by the way, that do not stop and ask for directions on the road!
4) They want the epidural more than the woman! and in some cases - they need it more!
I think its always interesting to ask yourself what you think other people think about you from time to time. To be perfectly honest, most of the time I do not care what people think about me. But i would imagine that if I asked people to say 1 word that best describes me, TYPICAL or NORMAL would not be on the list! I have enjoyed every step so far and I plan to enjoy the rest!
Most of the guys i have talked to have a horror story about the first week when they bring the baby home! Now, let me start by saying that I am in no way saying that I won't have one myself...in fact my main point is that I am PLANNING on having a rough time that first week! I have heard, "I had no idea it would be like this" and "That kid did nothing but scream all night!" My main thought is....What did you think was going to happen?!! It's like a Best Man at a wedding not being prepared to give a speech...it's going to happen...Prepare yourself!! Now, I have also hear that i can't prepare for this sort of change. Well, let me try - I am not going to sleep, and i am going to be rocking and walking the baby all day and night...and when the baby does sleep I will be doing laundry and washing bottles and changing diapers! I cant wait, consider me prepared!
The classes and registering are actually pretty exciting for me. I liked registering for the wedding, and the baby stuff is even better! Getting stuck in the breast pump aisle wasn't my favorite, but it wasn't so bad! The classes are what you make of them. i can not tell you how many guys told me how TERRIBLE they were, and some of the guys in my classes look so miserable that they would sell their souls to get out of it! Well, I like knowing where to go, when to go there, and what to expect. I obviously understand that all the techniques we have learned may not go exactly as planned, and that my sweet, darling wife may grab me by the shirt and say some crazy things...but all in all the classes are pretty good!
I guess I am different, and not the normal guy when it comes to having a baby. That being said - I know a lot of guys that feel the way I do. After going through what Christine and I did to get pregnant I do not like the negativity associated with pregnancy. The truth is that we were blessed to even get pregnant...so when someone tells me the famous lines of "You have no idea what you're getting into...." or (my personal favorite) "You just wait...." I don't want to hear it...because I DON'T care how hard it is...To quote Tom Hanks in "A League of Their Own" - "The HARD is what makes it great!!" I can promise you 1 thing....you will never hear me complain about my son Kevin, or my sleepless nights, or ANYTHING...because I am just happy to have the opportunity and the privilege of being a dad....and I think more people should stop complaining and embrace it as well!
**Christine UPDATE - She is doing well and just entered the 3rd trimester! We have the first shower planned with family and friends in NY next week and a 3D ultrasound planned for when her parents come here next! We can't wait for our first glimpse of our little man!!!