Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Time to Step Up Dad!!

Week 36? ALREADY? I know, it's hard to believe....trust me, I am having some issues with it myself! As most of you know we were waiting for Baby Kevin to decide what position he was going to enter the world in. Until recently he decided that he was going to slide into the world feet first like a base runner stealing a base in the big leagues. Although that sounds cool, it is not the ultimate way to be when you deliver! The doctors had their doubts that he would "flip" into the correct position (head down), and they told us that if he had not by week 36 that we could go ahead and schedule our C section! Kevin had other thoughts!

Every woman wants to give birth the regular way...you know, TONS of drugs and pushing...haha...But lately it seems that many doctors and patients are going to the C Section as the delivery of choice! Christine was finally warming up to the idea of a C Section and the idea that she would not have to be in labor for 36 hours. She was starting to think that a 45 minute procedure to bring Kevin into the world wasn't a terrible idea! In fact, we were bouncing around dates that we wanted as the birth date. May 19th was my choice because it would give me more time at home with the baby before returning to work...although Christine thought i only liked it because it is my parents anniversary and my grandfather's birthday! I am not going to say she is wrong on this one, but my story sounded good too! Christine liked the 18th or the 20th because she likes EVEN numbers...I can't make this stuff up....that was really her reason!

So the doctor came in and felt around and decided that the baby had not flipped and that we should go ahead and schedule a C Section for one of our dates (which would have definitely been one of Christine's dates, just for the record)! At the last second the doctor decided to get an ultrasound to be SURE of the baby's position. During this exam it was determined that my baby boy had indeed FLIPPED! he was head down and gearing up to enter the world as nature intends (you know, with the drugs and the pushing)...So the doctor said, "Now you have to wait for labor like everyone else!!" Come on doc - you know me by now, and we are not going to do this like ANYONE else! haha

So let me get this straight....for the last 4 weeks I have pretty much convinced myself that the horror stories i heard in baby class about the long labor, and the screaming, and the moaning, and the ice chips, and the leg holding, etc. would not be applying to me!! All of the sudden we are going to have to measure contractions and get our bags packed to do this thing the old-fashioned way! And if you have read my blog and know me....you know that I am loving this! So now I get to be the dad speeding to the hospital with a baby on the way!! YES!!!! We are both excited to welcome our baby boy into the world, but this does add some nerves to the situation. But, we will handle it and all will be OK! Since the due date is May 24th, and Christine has gestational diabetes, we cant go past that date...So if nothing happens by then she will be induced that day!

Did you ever notice that whenever a friend or family member has a baby you always get the same message..either on your phone, your email, or on facebook...it always says the SAME THING! It goes something like this!
"{Insert baby name here} was born on {insert date here} at {insert time here}, weighing {insert weight here} and was {inches} long! MOM AND BABY ARE DOING FINE!"
Now, don't get me wrong...i am not stupid enough to think that the dad did more or even equal to what the mom did to have that baby..so the dad should be fine...but why don't we mention the dads?? I think i know why! Think about it...the cadence in which we all say normal, everyday things is exactly the same day to day...like phone numbers, and birthdays. I think this is the way this Baby message has been passed down! For example...if you ask me when I was born - i say, "May 3rd 1980." If my answer was, "The 3rd day of May in the year 1980," that would screw you up and cause you to look at me funny! Its just the way everyone has ALWAYS said it, so it sticks! A better example is the phone numbers...how many people try to throw you off of the xxx-xxx-xxxx cadence by throwing a "sixteen eighty" in there instead of "1-6-8-0!" Generationally speaking, I think there is a gap between what was and what now is the way of child birth! True, the mom still is the one pushing, and the baby is still the one coming through the smallest opening in creation. But, the dad is doing a lot more than in the past! In the past the dads would not be anywhere near the hospital when their kids were born. They would drop off the wife and pick up the wife and baby! Now, if the woman is in labor for 46 hours, her partner is there with her...wiping her head, coaching, feeding ice chips, and getting called awful names and taking shots to the head!! The dad is also sleeping at the hospital with the mom and baby, and the dad is up doing all the duties since mom is resting from a long and exhausting surgery...Now, I am not saying the dad deserves more credit...because I am not stupid enough to type something like that in a blog when 90% of my readers are women!! I would never suggest that also because its not true. But for recent dads like my brother, most of my friends (i said most!) and definitely ME, that were there (or will be there) for the labor and slept at the hospital on those God-awful window ledges, and put in their time during the whole process, well....I think some credit can be a good thing!

All this being said dads...it's time to step it up and earn some of the credit! It's like anything else...if you don't want to be labeled as a certain type of person, then you need to go out of your way to reverse those feelings! Dads, keep fighting the good fight, and maybe one day we will get a blurb in the "Welcome Baby" notifications....just maybe, but probably not!!

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